


Who Moved My Space Cakes?

by Kopikido



Series: The House on Mammoth Street [3]
Category: Interpol
Genre: Comedy, Gen, alternative universe
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-05-04
Updated: 2014-05-04
Packaged: 2018-01-21 21:26:05
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 10
Words: 6,258
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1564634
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Kopikido/pseuds/Kopikido
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>One potential fight leads to a possible cure.  Or is it?</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> First published on my Tumblr.  
> Here’s another story branching out of the Interpol-inspired fan fic that I posted before. Again, this is just mainly a writing exercise so forgive me for the weird ideas and grammatical errors.

One morning, Paul walked in the dining room and found Carlos arranging some fruits on the fruit bowl.

“Morning,” Paul said. He’s pretty sure that it’s one of those mornings where he and Carlos would end up in an argument.

“I told you to keep the oranges away from each other, the apple should be facing the window, and the fruit bowl should be at least four inches away from the edge of the table top,” instead was Carlos’ reply.

Paul reached out and grabbed the apple before Carlos could stop him.

“Hey!” Carlos protested but it’s too late.

Paul bit on the apple and flashed a smirk.

“You moron,” Carlos sent dagger looks at him.

“Carlos, can’t you relax a bit?”

“You know what I feel when things are out of arrangement Paul? I feel that the world is upside down, both poles are de-magnetized and the Earth is out of its orbit.”

“OCD huh?” someone else’s voice spoke.

Paul and Carlos turned to see Sam standing by the door.

“Why don’t you take any medication Carlos?”

“Thanks for the advice Sam but I’ll have to wait for extra financial support from my parents to come through before I go to the doctor.”

“Er, what if I tell you that I could concoct some medication for your OCD?”

“Sam, the last thing I want is to be someone else’s guinea pig, okay?” said Carlos.

“Excuse me, BS Chemistry is my pre-med course before I went to Medical school.”

Carlos stared hard at Sam before he spoke: “Okay.”

“Good, I’m mixing it up for you tomorrow night before I go for my shift.”

——————

“Uh, Sam, don’t you think this is a bad idea?” Paul asked as he handed over a bag of powdered drug to Sam.

“Paul, you’ve been asking for the nth time,” Sam said while stirring the pot of concoction, “and for the nth time I’ll tell you that I know what I’m doing. Trust me in this, okay?”

After a few minutes,

“There! I think we’re done. We’re just going to let this baby cool before I pour it on the bottle.”

“S’ppose this would kill him instead?”

“Paul, nobody OD’s on this type of med and gets killed. The effect lasts longer though.”

“I know but—” Paul started again but Sam turned to face him.

“I know you that you are sick of arguing with Carlos because of his stickler idea of things and I am too. Now think of the temporary relief of being free from all the shit.”

Paul just nodded and as soon as the concoction cooled down, he helped Sam transfer it to a sports bottle.

“I’m gonna write down the instructions on the bottle so he’ll know how much he’ll drink from this bottle.”

Paul watched as Sam wrote down some instructions on the side of the bottle.

_I still think that this is somewhat a bad idea_ , he thought.

———————

The following morning. 8 o’ clock.

“Hey Carlos, did you get the formula that I’ve made for you?” Sam asked.

“What formula?”

“The one you asked me for your OCD stuff.”

Carlos frowned. “No. That’s what I’ve been wanting to ask you since last night.”

“I’ve put it in your sports bottle and placed it by the fridge door.”

“Sam, I didn’t saw it.”

“Then who took it then?”

Their conversation was cut short when they heard somebody singing:

_I’m signing in the rain_

_Oh what a glorious feeling!_

Sam and Carlos turned to where the voice came from.

"Oh shit," they muttered in united horror.


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Daniel singing in the rain? Preposterous! --Oh, wait.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Originally transferred from Tumblr, where the fangirls also thrive and wreck havoc and flowers.  
> And yes, this is mainly a writing exercise so bear with the silly idea and some grammatical whoopsies.
> 
> Again, the usual disclaimer: The following literary blub is purely fictional. It just so happen that the names of the main characters have real life counterparts (oh-so smexy men! Rawrrra!). Any incident, character or anything that happened in the real life are purely coincidental.

_I’m singin’ in the rain_  
 _Just singin’ in the rain_  
 _What a glorious feelin'_  
 _I’m happy again…_

Sam and Carlos turned to where the voice came from.

While it was normal to hear Daniel singing in the morning, today seems to be rather unusual. He wasn’t singing.

He was belting a tune at the top of his voice.

“Holy mother of God,” Sam muttered.

Daniel stopped by the door with a wide bright smile.

“Good morning guys! Beautiful day isn’t it?” he beamed.

“What the fuck, Dan?” Carlos raised one eyebrow.

Right before their disbelieving eyes, Daniel stood wearing a bright yellow shirt, powder blue denim jacket, matching powder blue jeans and white sneakers. His curly hair was ruffled as if he just got out straight from bed.

On his normal day, Daniel would be dressed up like a private school student— a dark blue cardigan over some starched white shirt, dark pair of pants and shiny, polished black shoes. His hair is usually styled immaculately with each hair strand in place in his attempt to tame his natural curls.

“Uh, ha-have you had your breakfast, man?” Sam managed to say after recovering from momentary shock.

“No thanks, man! I’ve got lots to do—oh I think I’ll grab a bite,” and Daniel took out a fork and stabbed a piece of bacon and stuffed it into his mouth. And took another. And another.

“Dan?” Carlos’ eyes widened in shock, “I thought you’re a vegetarian?”

“Mmmff mffff mfff,” Daniel replied with stuffed mouth. Bacon grease glistening at the corners of his lips.

Sam handed Daniel a glass of water to swallow while Carlos continues to eye him with disdained look.

“I said,” Daniel finally managed to speak clearly while wiping the grease with the back of his hand, “that’s got to be the stupidest idea I’ve ever heard in my whole damn life!”

Carlos’ jaw dropped. He was too shocked to say anything. He felt tempted to ask this sloppy Daniel faced idiot with an Un-Daniel attitude, “Where’s Daniel? What have you done to him?”

In a few minutes, Daniel had eaten most of the bacon on the serving plate while Carlos and Sam are yet to recover from their shock.

“Boy, I never thought that bacon tasted so good!” Daniel said flashing his dorkiest grin they’ve ever seen.

"Uh…" Carlos tried to speak.

“Oh boy! I’m off to Uni for my class. I’ll see you later guys!” and with that, Daniel did a little jiggly dance as he made his way to through the main door before bursting once more into a song:

_Come on with the rain_  
 _I’ve a smile on my face_  
 _I walk down the lane_  
 _With a happy refrain_  
 _just singin’_  
 **_singin’ in the raaaaaaain!!!_ **

Minutes later, Paul walked in with a bewildered look on his face.

“Have you guys seen that?” he said looking at Daniel’s direction.

“Don’t ask.” was Sam and Carlos’ response.


	3. Chapter 3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Daniel is basically out of his self. And then calls his mom. (Or mum, according to this side of the pond)

“Let me get this straight,” Paul started the conversation, “you made a medication for Carlos’ OCD right?” 

All four of them are sitting in a restaurant at Daniel’s insistence of treating them for dinner.

“Yup,” Sam answered as he set down his bottle of beer, “I made an SSRI formula. Basically, it releases one from his inhibitions. My psychiatrist friend uses it especially for the worst OCD cases. Works most of the time, he said.”

“I can see that,” Carlos interjected. Sitting on the opposite side of the table in front of him was Daniel who is busy tucking into a large medium rare steak rather than listen to them.

They all watched in silence as Daniel cut a piece of meat, swirl it into the pool of reddish oily sauce before hungrily pushing it into his mouth.

“How long would it take before the medication wears off?” Paul asked Sam.

“Um, judging from the large amount of the medicine he consumed, maybe 96 hours”

“Shit.”

“Eww, he doesn’t look good as a carnivore,” Carlos whispered to Sam.

One Saturday morning, as Sam got in from a night shift, he decided to drop by the kitchen to grab some beer from the fridge. The kitchen and dining room are joined together.

As he passed by the living room, he saw Daniel munching on a pork rind while dialing a number on the phone. Crumbs of pork rinds messing his lap and the carpet by his feet. 

“Hey Dan, morning,” he said.

Daniel looked up and smiled the goofiest smile he’s ever seen.

“Hey Sammy! My man! Want some?” and held a packet of pork rinds to him.

“No thanks, man,” Sam smiled uneasily. He wonders how Daniel would react once he gets back to his normal vegetarian neat freak self.  
Would he kick them all out of the house for accidentally giving him the medication? Hope not.

When he walked into the kitchen, Sam was surprised to find Carlos and Paul in the kitchen, each wearing an apron. Carlos had household gloves on each hand and washing the dishes by the sink while Paul stands in front of the stove and cooking some breakfast.

“I’m surprised you guys are here and not arguing,” Sam started as he opened the fridge door.

“I have to do some washing,” says Carlos as he continued washing the dishes with a sponge, “I can’t find any clean dishes and Daniel doesn’t want to do any cleaning.”

“And Dan doesn’t want to do any cooking either,” added Paul.

After Paul finished cooking and Carlos set four plates on the table, as he is averted to odd numbers, the three of them sat down for their breakfast.

While they were eating, they heard Daniel talking loudly and excited.

“Hello there gorgeous! Miss me? I miss you too!”

“Well, well,” Sam smiled as he lifted his beer to his lips, “at least Dan learned to speak to the ladies.”

“That’s his mom he’s calling,” said Carlos.

“Oh.” Sam sighed.

Then it’s Paul’s turn to speak again. “How long do you say this is going to last?”

“About 3 more days.”

“Yoohoo, guuys!” Daniel’s sing song voice floated in the air, “mom wants to speak to any of you.”

Sam, Paul and Carlos stared at each other. Then Carlos reluctantly stood up and went to the living room.

“Hey mom, it’s Carlito who wants to speak to you.” Daniel said gleefully before handing over the receiver to Carlos.

Meanwhile, back in the dining room.

“Sam, is there any way to reverse the effect?” Paul asked while sipping his coffee.

“Paul, it’s like trying to stop a bullet train running on full speed. If we do that, it might do more harm than good to Daniel.”

“Hey guys!”

They both nearly jumped from their seats when they heard the voice. It was Daniel.

“Jesus, Daniel! Don’t do that again!” Sam exclaimed as he rubbed his forehead. He wants to go to sleep and wish that this is all just a weird dream.

“Ooh, is that bacon that I see?” Daniel approached the table looking hungrily at the slices of bacon on the serving plate.

“Save some for Carl—” Paul began but during mid-sentence, Daniel took some bacon slice and ate it.

“Mmmmm!! Scrumptious!” Daniel muttered as he took some more.

After eating some bacon and eggs, Daniel went bounding back to the living room to speak once more to his mother on the phone.

Carlos came back to the dining room and sat down on his chair again.

The three of them shared a lighter and smoked their cigarettes.

“What did Daniel’s mom say?”

“Oh, nothing.”

“That’s weird.”

“Basically she’s yelling **‘What the hell you’ve done to my son?!’**

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Wow, it would be a surprise if somebody will read this but anyway, here it goes. When I posted the first story of the House on Mammoth Street (or HoMS), I thought I might explain a few things to the reader just to clarify a few things to them and also to let a few people know that I do not plan to make a single buck out of writing this unless Daniel Kessler or Carlos Dengler agrees to marry me. Okay, first of all, while the effect of Selective Serotonin Reuptake Inhibitor is quite exaggerated in this story, in real life, this is one of the used treatments for OCD, anxiety and personality disorders. And to those who don’t know it, the Real life Daniel Kessler is a vegetarian so I thought it would be freakish to imagine his AU counterpart chomping on meat especially pork (I was told he was Jewish or something like that). Oh, and I made him a bit of an OCD’d person but more of the Clean Freak OCD type while the AU Carlos would be the organized OCD who likes things in order but not necessarily accompanied by bleach and washing liquid. Regarding the OCD Carlos in the story, it stemmed from a conversation with my sis when she saw a vid of an interview of Carlos and DK and she said, “That Carlos guy had OCD tendencies”. I am not sure if she’s accurate but I could attest that the Real life CD had a usual good memory of details and can explain things in a detailed manner. So why not screw that up in my story? Muhahaha…sorry. The Alternative Universe Paul Banks, I imagined, is my designated voice of reason, the usual Only Sane Man in the quartet to counterbalance the OCD tendencies of Daniel and Carlos. I made Sam the medical student in my story because I believe, life in the student accommodation would be interesting if Art, Literature and Science students are put together.


	4. Chapter 4

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The weather isn't helping and Carlos expressed his hatred of his sharp memory.

The clock struck at 7:50 in the morning.

Sam and Paul got out of their room and are discussing a few things as they descend the stairs. 

They momentarily stopped talking when they found Carlos in the living room, face buried to his hands.

“You okay, man?” Paul asked.

Carlos nodded and then shook his hand. Then he lifted his face and said: “Can anyone of you guys check out Daniel in the kitchen?”

Sam volunteered and went to the kitchen doorway and had a quick glance of Daniel by the cook stove. Frying what seemed to be some bacon.

“Uh, yeah, he’s here,” Sam said and turned to Carlos and Paul’s direction again.

“And?”

“Well, he’s—HOLY SHIT!”

Standing by the kitchen stove and cooking while whistling a happy tune, is Daniel, stark naked wearing only an apron and fluffy socks.

“Uh…D-Dan?”

“Oh, hi man,” Daniel turned to smile at him, “I’m almost done cooking.”

"Are you feeling a bit uh…?” Sam started, thinking whether to laugh or scream.

“Man, I bet this summer would be quite harsh. I feel very warm today.”

Paul also took a peek and his eyes also widened when he saw Daniel. He went back to the living room and sat opposite Carlos.

“What have you done?” he asked Carlos.

“The hell do I know!” Carlos whimpered, “I just woke up and saw him walking around the house wearing…wearing….”

“Basically butt naked?” Paul offered.

“Oh shut up, Paul!” Carlos buried his face to his hands again as if trying to shake off the memory from his mind.

“He’s got nice butt though,” Paul gloated.

“Aaargh, I hate my photographic memory!”


	5. Chapter 5

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Daniel loves the fair and the ice cream. Carlos hated it.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter is mainly a play on the relationship of the Dessler (both the Real Life and their AU counterpart). Yes, this is just a writing exercise and therefore prone to mad ideas, grammatical errors and author’s slashy delusions. The story kind of evolved from the Real Life Carlos’ hate of traveling.

Carlos was reading a book in his bed when he turned his head to see Daniel standing in front of him with a silly grin.

“Hey Carlos!”

“Uh, what is it this time, Dan?” Carlos started to get nervous. He now wished he would have shared the room with Sam or Paul and not Daniel especially the one on meds.

“D’you wanna go hit the town with me?”

“Where?”

To his surprise, Daniel jumped excitedly on his bed like a child.

“I want to go the theme park! Please Carlos, take me there! Please? Please?” while batting his eyelashes.

Carlos swallowed quite hard. Shit, the theme park. As a child, his father once took him there and he never quite liked the experience. Especially that time at the rollercoaster…

“Well you can go there on your own, Daniel. You’re way past legal, driving and drinking age.”

“C’mon Carlos, you’re my bestfriend! I want you to go with me!”

Carlos was stunned at the moment. On his normal self, Daniel never openly declared that to him. Yes, they may have a bit of disagreements whenever Daniel displaces the chair when he tidies their room or when his cigarette ashes spill on the bedside cabinet between their beds but Carlos has to admit to himself that as far as he can remember, Daniel is the only person outside his immediate family who have managed to put up with his OCD.

But still, he decided to say no.

“Aaaaw, please Carlos!”

“No, Daniel,” Carlos answered firmly as he tried to go back to his reading, “if you still want, you can wait for Paul and drag him instead with you. I got an essay to write about—”

he stopped abruptly when he noticed Daniel’s footwear. It’s the usual white shoes he wore. But he’s wearing two different colored socks. One is navy blue and the other is grey.

“Daniel, your socks are mismatched,” he pointed out. “Change them, please.”

Daniel looked down and then a naughty grin crept to his face.

“I will change them Carlos—if you’ll agree to go with me.”

“No, I won’t go with you and that’s that!”

“Then I’m not changing my socks then.” Daniel smiled as he moved down to the foot of Carlos’ bed.

Carlos cursed under his breath. He remembered that if Daniel wants something from him, all he has to do is to tilt the picture frame in their room and wear mismatched clothes. After all, it takes an OCD to win over an OCD.

“Alright then,” he sighed with defeat.

“Yay! Thanks, bestfriend!” Daniel jumped to hug him before Carlos could push him away.

—————-

Carlos turned his head to one direction, then to the other.

The theme park was a bit crowded at that time and mostly filled with young school children and their parents.

In the midst of the noises of children screaming and running around, there he was, a Political Science university student with well styled angular black hair and wearing a dark windbreaker, black pants and shiny black Doc Marten boots, looking so out of place.

And Daniel is missing.

“Shit, shit, where the hell are you Daniel?” he muttered angrily as he looked around.

He heard the sound of the joyous melody usually indicating the cotton candy stand.

He was about to turn to the opposite direction when the corner of his eye saw something.

At the cotton candy stand, among the crowd of small children stands Daniel looking excited as the cotton candy vendor handed him the largest pink cotton candy ever seen.

Daniel handed over the money to the vendor and afterwards, peeled a few bits of cotton candy.

“Hey mister,” one boy, possibly 9 years old, “aren’t you too old to eat cotton candy?”

“Nope,” he answered indifferently as he began to eat.

“I think you’re one of those retards!” the boy shouted back. Several children giggled.

Carlos came over.

“Hey Dan, I’ve been looking all over for you. Let’s go.”

Daniel just nodded as he was too busy eating the cotton candy.

“Yeah, take your retard brother with you, Mr. Vampire,” the boy yelled back at Carlos before laughing boisterously. Several children also joined with the laughter.

Carlos felt his face flush with anger. He went near the boy and looked down at him in an intimidating fashion.

“Look here, fatty. As much as I’d like to drink your blood, I’m afraid all I can suck out of you are the grease from the burgers and fries you stuff your mouth with. Why not grab yourself a big cup of Shut the Fuck Up instead?”

The children went dead silent and the boy went pale with fear.

Carlos led Daniel by the elbow and as they are about to leave, Daniel turned to the kids and stuck out his pink cotton candy-stained tongue at them.

———————-

They’ve already walked quite a distance and Daniel had almost eaten all of the cotton candy when he suddenly stopped.

Carlos who was walking ahead of him, sensed this and looked back.

“What is it?”

He was hoping that he’s only dreaming but Daniel is really staring at the rollercoaster running fast on its rails with people screaming. Shit.

“Carlos, I want to try that.”

Carlos grimaced in horror. No. Not the rollercoaster please.

“I-I don’t have the money…” his voice faltering.

“Oh, don’t worry! I still have enough money here with me. I’ll treat you.” Daniel smiled and then dragged Carlos with him to the ticket booth.

In one part of the theme park ground.

“Dad, I’m kinda scared.” said one boy.

“Don’t worry son,” the man smiled, “it’s a rollercoaster. I’m sure you’ll like it.”

“Dad, I don’t think I want to ride that.”

“Don’t worry Timmy, look everybody is enjoying it.”

The rollercoaster passed by over their heads trailed by a man’s loud high-pitched scream:

**“HEEEEELPMEEEEEEEEEHHHH!!!!!!!”**

The man and his son looked up momentarily before the man spoke up again:

“Well, I mean, most people are enjoying it.”

——————

The clock in the living room struck 9pm.

“So, you and Dan went to the theme park huh?” Paul asked as he lit a cigarette with a book balanced on his lap.

Carlos, lying face down on the sofa, replied with a muffled, “Uh huh.”

“It was great, Paul!” Daniel spoke enthusiastically while munching a pack of gummy bears, “I’ve always wanted to go there and earlier today, I managed to get there! Finally! And I even got to ride the rollercoaster with Carlos!”

“Carlos?”Paul asked but Carlos only replied with muffled groan.


	6. Chapter 6

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Kung Fu fight? How did Stella Artois get into this?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The 6th part from that mad house! After the Dessler episode (squee!), here’s something for the PDA (Paul-Daniel Admiration) Society.

Paul walked into the bar where he usually gets his drinks right after his work at the diner.

It was a bar just a few blocks away from his work place and he had a rather hectic time at the diner that he thought he badly needed a drink before heading home.

"I’ll be having a Stella Artois please," Paul said to the bartender and when he finally got his beer, he went to sit down on his usual chair. A bit at the corner near some pool tables where he could see people coming in through the door.

Somebody dropped a few coins into the jukebox machine and it started to play.

The door opened and several people walked in. Judging them from their looks, he could tell that this group are University students. There was loud chatter heard from the group that filled the whole bar.

He heard one voice say to the bartender, “One Guinness please! Thanks!” and it sounded familiar.

Paul looked up and saw Daniel smile and wave at him.

He smiled back and raised his beer at him.

As Daniel was approaching him, somebody pushed him causing him to spill his glass of Guinness on one man sitting among the group of burly bikers.   
"You idiot!" the man spoke angrily as he stood up.  
Paul stared in horror as the burly bald man, probably about more than 6 feet in height, held Daniel by the collar and partly lifted him off the ground.  
"Hey man, easy," Daniel flashed a silly grin with both hands raised in the air. He dropped his glass of Guinness where it crashed and spilled on the floor.  
"Oh shit," Paul muttered. He stood up and forgot about his half empty beer.  
He rushed to Daniel’s aid.  
"Dude, let him go," he told the burly man. Shit, the last thing he wants with Daniel on meds is to get in trouble and the kind of trouble that would involve him.  
"So, you’re this dork’s friend huh?" the man snorted while pointing at Daniel.  
"Dude, I said let him go. He’s just a kid," he calmly repeated.  
"Okay, Spotty" the man said as he removed his grip on Daniel’s collar but to Paul’s horror, the man immediately grabbed him by the collar, "Cause it’s your spotted ass that will get kick" and raised his tattooed fist.  
Paul tried to close his eyes but in a flash he saw Daniel clutch the man’s wrist.  
“‘Scuse me man,” Daniel said with that stupid grin, “did you just insult my friend?”  
"What the hell—" the man was stupefied and tried to shake Daniel’s grip on his wrist but Daniel seemed to be too strong.  
"You see, nobody insults my friend like that," Daniel continued.  
Then the goofy smile on his face melted and was replace with a furious look.

"And anyone who insults my friends will GET THEIR ASSES KICKED!"  
————————-

Paul sat down wearily beside Daniel as the prison bars closed in front of them.

He searched around his pockets for some cigarettes and managed to find his last.

“Honestly dude, I have to admit to myself—that was fun!” Daniel mused while swinging his legs childishly.

Paul did not answer. He lit his cigarette and then after having his first puff, rubbed his forehead and gingerly touched a small wound at the side of his nose which he got while trying to dissipate the brawl.

The last thing he expected was to end up in jail when he just wants to unwind. And also to have Daniel as his cellmate.  
——————————

Paul momentarily stepped out into the cold before getting inside the warm backseat of Sam’s car. All four of them are in the car, Sam on the driver’s seat and Paul and Carlos in the backseat with Daniel sitting between them.  
"You should be glad that I just finished my shift when Carlos called and told me that you got into trouble."  
"Thanks man," he said and after a few minutes Sam had the car moving.  
"What the hell happened?" asked Carlos.  
"You see, there’s this guy who tried to pick on Daniel—"  
"But this guy insulted Paul," Daniel interrupted, "and I told him that he shouldn’t call Paul as Spotty but he didn’t listen so, I kicked his and his friends’ asses. Hahahaha! I never thought that ass-kicking was so much fun! And I never thought that the jujitsu class my mom insisted me to do when I was ten would be useful."  
Carlos (and Sam through the rearview mirror) stared at Daniel in disbelief.  
Paul had to remind himself that the diminutive guy who knocked down three larger men with his flying kicks and karate chops moments ago is the same wiry, socially awkward and mildly OCD’d Daniel who is afraid of cockroaches, would readily adopt any stray cat he would come across the street, cries while watching sappy movies, and faints at the sight of blood (which is probably one of the main reasons of him being a vegetarian) and one time, after being accidentally fed with dog ashes.  
——————————-

 

"Sam, you sure made a very good medicine," Paul remarked a few minutes later. Daniel is now snoring in his sleep and leaning against Carlos with some drool spilling from the corner of his lips.  
Carlos would normally shake off Daniel as he is uncomfortable of getting touchy-feely with his housemates but he decided that he’d prefer Daniel asleep because that would help keep them out of further trouble.  
"Come to think of it, it may have brought out Daniel’s crouching moron, hidden badass side."  
"I shouldn’t have agreed to your idea, Sam," muttered Carlos, "this is your fault."  
"Gee thanks, Carlos," Sam replied sarcastically, "by the way, I just did that pro bono so you don’t have to ruin your independent ways by asking mom and dad for financial aid!"  
"Guys, stop that," Paul interrupted before the argument escalates to a fight.  
Carlos and Sam stopped.  
"I mean," Paul continued, "look on the bright side. For the past few days that Dan’s acting like this, it made me think that he must have been living a repressed life for a long time. When he drank the medication, it released him from his inhibitions, overcame his fears, learned what meat tastes like and enjoyed it. I think, it somehow put a sort of balance in his life and I am hoping, when Dan gets back to his normal self at least he will appreciate that fact that he gets to experience the things he couldn’t normally do because of his OCD."  
"Oh so you mean, in some way, Samuel saved Daniel’s sanity by releasing his insanity?" Carlos offered.  
"In a way, yes."  
Normally, Carlos would disagree with Paul and his strange logic but staring down at the sleeping Daniel, Paul might just be right.


	7. Chapter 7

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Sam nearly punches Daniel. Daniel singing in French. Carlos becomes a babysitter.

The following morning, Sam is at the kitchen preparing his cup of coffee.

He was busy pouring some boiling hot water on his mug when a hand suddenly rapped him sharply by the shoulder causing him to spill some of the hot water on his fingers.

He muttered a swearing, slammed the kettle down on the worktop and turned around furiously to punch the prankster on the face.

Then he stopped as soon as he saw Daniel’s face.

“Hey Sammy! What’s up?”

“Jesus Christ, Daniel! Stop doing that! I could've punched you.” Sam blurted and shook his hand to cool off the slight burning sensation.

“Hahaha! C’mon Sammy, you’re not gonna do that. I trust you my friend,” Daniel replied.

Sam just shook his head and sighed. After all, it’s the last day of the medication’s effect and hopefully tomorrow, Daniel would be back to his normal self.

Hopefully.

Then Daniel went searching around the cabinets. Slamming the cabinet as he did so.

“Dan, stop that! You’re gonna wake up Paul and Carlos.”

Daniel just smiled at him like a child trying to say ‘Don’t worry i’m a good boy’ before opening the other cabinets.

"Ooh, what’s this?" Daniel spoke as he pulled out a corked bottle from the cabinet by the corner.

"Oh that? That’s an absinthe." said Sam. "One of my colleagues gave to me. He said he made it himself."

Daniel uncorked the bottle and coughed a bit after sniffing the content.

"Careful with that, Dan. My colleague told me that baby was pretty nasty."

Daniel flashed again his goofy grin. “Don’t worry Sammy, I won’t mess with this. Trust me.”

And then replaced the bottle back in the cabinet.

Sam just rolled his eyes upwards and prayed that this doesn’t mean another sign of trouble.

—————————

“Why can’t I go with you guys?” Carlos said to Sam that night. Sam and Paul decided to hit the bar for some drinks. And also to get away from Daniel.

“Carlos, you stay here and keep Daniel from getting out of the house,”Sam whispered.

“And I don’t want to wind up again in jail,” added Paul.

Daniel couldn’t hear them because he was at the kitchen busy cooking some popcorn (they are all glad he wasn’t naked this time!) while whistling and singing an upbeat French song:

_Les cucurbites…cucurbites_

_Les cucurbites s’agitent_

_Les cucurbites s’agitent…_

“Guys, I feel like you’re going to leave me in the cage with a hungry lion.” Carlos began.

“Carlos,” Sam said with one hand on Carlos’ lean shoulder, “we trust you to keep Dan out of trouble. And if anything goes wrong, just give us a call, okay?”

“But—” Carlos wanted to say something but the combined dagger stares from Sam and Paul told him that he should stay behind.

—————————  
“You kids behave well,” Sam said by the doorstep as he and Paul are leaving.

“Trust me Sammy! I’ll make sure Carlos won’t do anything bad,” Daniel smiled cheerfully.

 _Or the other way around_ , Carlos thought as the front door closed.


	8. Chapter 8

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Carlos babysits. Daniel sings again.

Carlos decided that they should watch some movies. This was after all, Daniel’s favorite past time. When he was still the sane, neat freak Daniel, that is.

A few minutes into the movie, Daniel started to squirm which Carlos finds distracting.

Then without a word, Daniel got up which startled Carlos a bit.

“Where are you going?”

“I’m just going to grab some drink, Carlos.”

Carlos tried to turn his attention back to the movie. He perked up his ears to listen to any faint sounds of breaking glass or the door slamming, in case Daniel would decide to escape.

He heard some cabinets slam and some footsteps.

Carlos turned his head and saw Daniel drinking something straight from a bottle he had never seen before.

“Hey what’s that?”

“Oh this? Just an absinthe.”

“What? Daniel, you’re not supposed to drink it like that!”

Daniel stuck out his tongue at Carlos, “Yah, make me!”

Carlos turned his face away and closed his eyes to fight the urge to grab Daniel by the neck and choke him.

Daniel sat down beside Carlos and continued drinking. Carlos sighed and shook his head. He tried to focus his attention on the television screen when he sensed Daniel staring at him. He turned to see that Daniel’s eyes are indeed fixated on him.

“What?”

“You’re so concerned of me, Carlos.” Daniel began while looking at him straight in the eye. Unblinking.

“Shut up, Daniel.”

“You sure it isn’t some other kind of love?”

“Daniel!”

Daniel just laughed at him and drank the last of the absinthe. After discarding the bottle, he started to sing:

_You make me lose my buttons,_

_Yeah you make me spit,_

_I don’t like my clothes anymore…_

“Quit singing will you, Dan?” Carlos replied irritably.

“C’mon Carlos, what’s wrong with a bit of merriment? You should be joining your bestfriend instead.”

Carlos didn’t spoke. After all, Sam said that it’s on the last day of the medication that people on meds act their worst. He just prayed that it would wear off quickly before he loses his patience.

_Somehow baby we’ll beat this mess_

_It’s the time **fuck** the surface to meet the specialist…_

"Dan!"

Daniel ignored Carlos and continued singing at the top of his voice.

_I love the way_

You put me in the big house

_I love the waaaaaaaaay_

_You put me in the BIG HOUSE!_

"Danieeeeel!!!"


	9. Chapter 9

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> What's a Philadelphian Vulcan pinch? And who is afraid of a rabbit?

“Do you think it’s a good idea to leave Carlos with Daniel, Sam?” Paul asked.

They’re both sitting at the bar each downing some Stella Artois and sharing one pack of cigarettes.

“What, you want them here in the bar with us? Paul, I don’t dream of ending up in jail. Not tonight.” says Sam as he took another puff of his cigarette.

Paul didn’t say anything. Frankly, he was glad that Sam made the decision to have just the two of them. But somehow, he can’t help but feel sorry for Carlos. He hoped that Carlos is doing his “babysitting” chore well.

—————————-

They did had a great time at the bar with plenty of drinks and were glad that no trouble happened.

They were by the door of the house and Sam was turning the key when they heard a thud and sounds of struggling.

They quickly went in and found Carlos and Daniel at the living room floor caught in a middle of a struggle. The bottle of absinthe lies on one corner of the carpeted floor. Empty.

“What the hell?” Sam blurted in disbelief.

Carlos was lying with his back on the carpet, arms outstretched with one hand pushing Daniel’s face away.

Daniel, on the other hand, was laughing as he straddles Carlos.

"Holy shit." Paul uttered.

"Fellas, HELP!" Carlos yelled, "Rape! Rape!"

" **Kissy Kessy, Carly! Hahahaha!** " Daniel laughed maniacally and licked his lips obscenely. 

Sam and Paul stood frozen with shock a few distances away.

Then Daniel puckered his lips and leaned over Carlos’ face to try and kissed him.

"What the hell are you guys standing there for? Do something! AAAAAAAHH! " Carlos screamed when he felt Daniel’s breath on his neck.

Sam calmly walked closer and delivered one loud whack at the back of Daniel’s head.

Daniel was instantly knocked unconscious and slumped against Carlos’ chest.

"Vulcan pinch, Philly style," Sam said, cracking his knuckles.

Carlos rolled the unconscious Daniel off him, sat up and wiped his sweaty forehead.

"Shit, that was close! I assume he’ll be back to normal tomorrow. I don’t want to wake up with him on top of me humping me like some sex-mad rabbit."

"I know some girls who would happily pay to see that," said Sam.

"Oh shut up Sam!" Carlos said as he got up and dusted himself while trying to catch his breath, "God, I need a cigarette and a drink."

"I think I need cigarettes and a brain bleach," says Paul.


	10. Chapter 10

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Daniel is back. And gone again. And Carlos owes Sam a few dollars.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Again, the usual boring, redundant disclaimer: The following literary attempt is purely fictional. The names of the main characters happen to have real life counterparts in the form of very very gorgeous men of magnanimous proportions. Any incident, character or anything that happened in the real life are purely coincidental except that these guys are really, really gorgeous. Oh, did I mention that they are very gorgeous? And while I am somewhat obliged to say that I don’t own these guys, I am just informing anyone not to copy this story without permission as this might land you a spot inside the mental hospital because people might think you’ve gone loco for writing such thing.

The following morning,  
Carlos, Sam and Paul are in the dining room. Paul was up early because he’s on morning shift at the diner and he volunteered to cook breakfast while Sam was busy helping Carlos nurse his bruises from last night’s incident.

They all froze when they heard sounds of the bedroom door closing and some footsteps descending from the stairs.

They all turned their heads in unison when Daniel came into the doorway.

"Morning guys," said Daniel in a cheerful tone.

Silence.

Carlos shivered a bit when he saw Daniel wearing a white sweater and powder blue jeans. Daniel usually prefers dark clothes so does this might mean that the medication hasn’t worn off?

 _Oh shit_ , he mumbled as thoughts of last night’s incident came back flashing to his mind.

"Guys?" they saw Daniel spoke with a bewildered look. "Anything wrong?"

There was a momentary silence before Paul spoke, “Um, how are you Dan? You okay?”

"Yeah, I am," Daniel replied still with the bewildered look, "Just wondering why you guys are acting so weird."

Sam, Carlos and Paul stared at each other with uncertainty.

“Guys?” Daniel spoke again. They turned their attention back to him.

“Uh, Dan,” Carlos began, “why are you wearing that white sweater?”

Daniel frowned and stared down at his sweater. “Oh this? I can’t find any clean black sweater. Good thing you mentioned that because I’m pretty sure I’ve washed all my sweaters last weekend. I was wondering why all of a sudden, I’m having difficulty finding any clean clothes.”

“You mean, you don’t remember what happened these past few days?” Sam asked.

"Frankly, I don’t remember anything at all."

"Really?"

"Well, all I remember was that I have to do some Uni work and that’s all."

"I am still not convinced," Carlos whispered to Sam.

"Convinced of what?" Daniel moved closer while eyeing them with suspicion.

Silence.

"You guys are not planning to pull any prank on me, aren’t you?" Daniel raised one eyebrow.

"No, Dan. Of course not," Paul said.

"Hmm…okay," Daniel said shrugging his shoulders, much to their relief, and then went to open the fridge, "I mean, I was just thinking that — **AAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHH!!!!!** "  
then he went pale and fainted on the floor.

The other three came rushing to Daniel’s side. Paul carried Daniel to the living room as Carlos and Sam inspected the fridge.

"Samuel, how many times do we have to tell you not to put a cadaver arm inside the vegetable drawer?!"

"Hey, I covered it well with plastic wrap!"

"That’s not enough!"

"Look Carlos, I got an exam in Human Anatomy so I need to bring that arm home."

"That’s not the point!"

"Guys!" Paul called out from the living room, "can anyone of you lend a hand here?"

"Oh well," Sam said to Carlos as they both slowly made their way to the living room, "at least Daniel’s back to normal."

"Yup." Then Carlos whispered to Sam, "Er, do you mind making me another one of those meds? There’s this hot chick that I like but she’s too painfully shy."

"No, Carlos."

"20 bucks?"

"I said NO!"

"Guys?" Paul called out again.

"Okay, how about 30 then?" then Carlos shoved some paper bills into Sam’s palm.

"Deal."


End file.
